SANDCHATHAMWICH — Authoritarianism was decisively defeated on the Route 6A shoulder Saturday morning between 9:15 and 11:00, organizers confirmed, before the assembled forces of democracy withdrew to a nearby establishment for eggs.
“We held the line,” said guild spokesperson Karen SpeaksToManager, adjusting a sign reading NO KINGS that she had made the previous evening while watching a livestream about how to make a sign. “For ninety minutes, tyranny did not pass this rotary.”
Tyranny, reached for comment, was four hundred miles away and unaware the rotary existed.
The action drew a reported forty participants, twenty-two of whom had also attended the previous action, and eleven of whom had attended every action since 2017 without at any point learning the name of their state representative.
“People ask what we accomplished,” said Karen Level-40-Postcard, who has mailed an estimated 4,000 postcards to eleven states, none of them this one. “And I say: we were seen.”
Pressed on whether anyone had attended the town’s zoning hearing three days earlier — at which a 46-unit affordable housing proposal was tabled for the fourth time before an audience of nine — the guild confirmed that the hearing had conflicted with a livestream.
The event concluded at 11:00 sharp, organizers noted, in accordance with the schedule, and well before anyone holding a different sign was expected to arrive.
“Next Saturday,” Karen SpeaksToManager confirmed, “same rotary. In case it comes back.”